You know when you're waiting to hear something that means the world to you, but is of no urgency whatsoever to the person who is either deciding the news or delivering it? Maybe you don't (bless you, if you don't!) but I've been there countless times over the last 10 years in the "real world" since college. I think I am driving myself the least crazy I ever have right now, though. Before I even put my feet on the floor this morning, I got a word from God.
Backstory: I switched my alarm clock with Will a while back, b/c he wanted one with a CD player in his room, and I only use the radio, anyway, so I didn't mind. I've been irritated, though, that I can't get my radio station to pick up on my "new" one. It picks up maybe 3 stations total, and the only thing I can get w/o major static is this old school organ church music station.
It's actually pretty hysterical to wake up to sometimes, but this morning was divine: a gorgeous chorale repeating over and over, "Wait upon the Lord, wait upon the Lord, wait upon the Lord, wait upon the Lord, wait upon the Lord, wait upon the Lord..." I sat up to turn it off after a minute and said, "OK, God. I hear you today." And I've had peace all day.
I've focused on more great verses, too:
"For I know the plans I have for you," says the Lord . "They are plans for good and not for disaster, to give you a future and a hope. In those days when you pray, I will listen. If you look for me wholeheartedly, you will find me. I will be found by you," says the Lord. "I will end your captivity and restore your fortunes. I will gather you out of the nations where I sent you and will bring you home again to your own land." - Jeremiah 29:11-14
Then he said, "Don't be afraid, Daniel. Since the first day you began to pray for understanding and to humble yourself before your God, your request has been heard in heaven. I have come in answer to your prayer." - Daniel 10:12 (God gives peace even when you are living a nightmare. You just have to ask.)
See, God has come to save me. I will trust in him and not be afraid. The LORD GOD is my strength and my song; he has given me victory. - Isaiah 12:2
You satisfy me more than the richest feast. I will praise you with songs of joy. - Psalm 63:5 (God is the only thing that satisfies us; not jobs, people, things, etc.)
He performs wonders that cannot be fathomed, miracles that cannot be counted. - Job 9:10 (There will always be things we don't have the answers to. Trade your questions for trust. Blessed are those who believe but still do not understand.)
So, the pain part. When we moved into this house over 13 months ago, I vigilantly pointed out the step down from our kitchen into the family room. I could just see the kids tearing through the house, tripping, and breaking a bone or at least busting a lip. And they have certainly tripped over it this last year...but *I* never had - until today. We were on our way out the door, and I just wanted to hop over to the couch and grab the remote to turn off the TV. I don't know if it was my clunky shoes or if I just had a moment of complete incoherence, but the next thing I knew, my shins were smacking the wooden ledge and I was flat on my face. Owwwww! I apparently tried to catch myself with my right hand (thank goodness! I'm a lefty, so I can still function) and that hurts worse than anything else, (bending my thumb.) :-( I'll be totally fine, but I just wanted to cry, "Seriously???"
And the tears: no, not from falling, (although I did cry for a second,) but from the Olympic opening ceremonies. I've said it before, but I am utterly obsessed with the idea of shared experience. Anything that brings people from all over the country and especially the world together stops me in my tracks. I *have* to get in on it and watch as much as I can with everyone. For whatever reason, it's extremely important to me to be a world citizen. Maybe it's b/c my parents instilled such a deep value for respecting and learning about other cultures? We watched the news together every night that I can remember, and the key thing was, my parents explained it. It wasn't a passive thing on above our heads. I'm already trying to do the same (on a monitored level, since they're still so young) with Will & Annelise - like explaining Haiti, for example. Another big family thing growing up was watching "National Geographic" specials. I think that set me on the path to becoming a geography queen. That and - I swear I'm not joking - our World Map shower curtain in my & Andy's bathroom! Like it or not, it's a place I sat for at least a few minutes every single day; it was in front of my face, and boy did I learn my countries!!! (Yes, I have one for Will & Annelise, too!)
I just can't fathom not wanting to learn everything and experience as much as you can about this amazing world God has made! I have always been insatiably curious about it and have always longed to feel connected to (or able to identify with) as many people as possible. (Maybe that's why I love blogging, too?)
Anyway, the Olympics totally fall into the "world coming together" & learning about other cultures spectrum, so of course, I am watching. I really don't give a flip about winter sports, (y'all know how much I hate winter period! I'll probably only purposely watch figure skating & men's hockey,) but I still can't help getting misty when I hear a moving personal story and see that athlete go on to win.